It’s probably no great surprise to my frequent readers that I have a pretty crappy body image. I know all the lines…. it’s not what is outside but what is inside….your weight should not define you….TV and magazine images are not representative of real women… I’ve got it. None of that changes my feeling of being g fat, because I have been more fit than I am now.
I learned a long time ago not to judge myself by stepping on a scale, but by how my clothes fit. And, since I moved here to take care of my parents, I have gained 4 dress sizes. That means I’ve bought at least two new wardrobes in 6 years.
Working out with John (Myers, my trainer) has made me much stronger and toned my muscles, but menopause is wreaking havoc on my ability to lose the fat that covers my toned muscles.
Believe it or not, there’s a positive end to this wordy post……
Last night, I actually felt good about myself as my new Lil Maggie Lucky Brand Jeans would not stay “up” even tho I had a belt on. And…..even better, when I went into Kroger to get mom her Sunday New York Times (it was after midnight), Jim saw the cashier dude totally check my ass out as I walked by him to pick up some other groceries….and then watch me walk out the door.
When I got back in the van and Jim told me, I swear, I couldn’t wipe the smile off my face. I’m vain, I know it. I will probably go to hell on a road paved with the sin of vanity but for just a moment….I felt good.
Both me. 8 years apart.